Why He Hasn’t Committed
You must be saying to yourself: “I wonder what’s holding back my man from proposing to me. I want to get married – but why can’t I make him commit? I know he loves me, what’s wrong with him?”
But is it him or is it you? It might very well be you!
It’s a fact: There are more single men than women in the country which means that your man has a lot of choices out there. So what’s a woman to do to make him commit? Show him that you are his soul mate and eliminate his fear of marriage.
Here are things that you’re doing or not doing that could be giving your man serious pause about moving forward:
- Maybe you’re clingy and needy which means you are emotionally high maintenance. You always want him around. Constantly keeping tabs on your man’s whereabouts, calling and texting him is a huge turn-off. This behavior not only reveals your insecurity, but also makes you look like you don’t have a life outside the relationship. And that makes you a dull and boring person.
- Keep your man guessing about you. Have some mystery about you. Don’t be “on call” for him or be too accessible and available. Don’t take the fun of the chase from your man. Yes, even in this 21st century, this has not changed. Men still looove the chase, so let him!
- Get out of the house. Spend time with your friends, volunteer or join some groups that cater to your interests. Let him know you have an active, engaging and interesting life outside of him. Show him that you have other priorities outside of the two of you.
- You need to make your guy feel that you have options; hint that there are other men interested in you (like your hot yoga teacher). But that you choose him. Make him feel very lucky that he gets to spend time with you.
- Flirting with his friends to make your man jealous and make him commit is a really dumb move, and will make you look pathetic and desperate. Ok, so maybe your guy’s friend is attracted to you and flirting with you. Sure, it’s flattering, but don’t make the big mistake of encouraging the attention.Here’s the thing: would you like your boyfriend flirting with any of your girlfriends? Absolutely not! So don’t you do it.
- Being overly self-sufficient and independent that you don’t need a man isn’t going to cut it. This behavior makes most men feel insecure.There’s nothing wrong with being a strong, self-confident, successful and independent woman, who is able to take care of the kids and the household.
But here’s the catch: Men want to feel needed, but at the same time, want to be taken cared of. They want to feel you need them, but god forbid you act needy! Yes, it sounds like a paradox, contradictory. It’s kind of a tricky balancing act. But that’s what men want.
- Giving ultimatums to make him commit and propose can have the opposite effect. As a matter of fact, they can be disastrous.Don’t give ultimatums unless you’re ready to walk out of the relationship if it doesn’t go your way. Too many women use this approach without any positive results because they’re bluffing and don’t mean it.
Giving an ultimatum is like demanding that your man do something he might not want to do or ready to do. It is a show of control and men resent it because they want to be in control.
Do you, by any chance, recognize yourself in any of the above? If so, you might want to make an effort and re-position yourself to make it easier for your man to commit to you.